The Search for God

   You may know that my formal studies began to focus, very early, on the question of the "experience of God," first of all from a biblical, prophetic perspective (How did a prophet like Jeremiah know that God spoke to him^) and then philosophically through the tradition that ranges from Willliam James to Bernard Lonergan. Here the focus is more philosophical. I see it as a philosophical stance that is coherent with what I have come to understand of the Judeo-Christian tradition.

   There seems to be a lot of confusion about “God.”  No surprise: both the concept and the reality easily escape us, particularly in view of the constant noise that our culture creates around and within us. Still, at least for me, the existence of “God” is not at all a question of faith. It is as evident as anything we might want to point to in life. The atheists are quite wrong in this respect. However, at the same time, I need to add, that there is no atheist who, after explaining to me the God they did not believe in, did not find me entirely in agreement.    We need then to ask ourselves what we mean by “God.”

   Let me suggest, for purposes of our argument, that “God” is the driving force that moves us to action in our lives, the central value that is foundational to the meaning we assign to life. This seems to me to be a fairly acceptable definition of the term in most contexts. In this sense then, I begin a discussion of “God” from the meaning we assign to the word and I grant to all the right to declare what they mean by “God” and then either embrace or reject it. It is up to each of us to discover what that might be and what that means for the direction their life is taking. The examples in history are abundant: God is money, fame, power, peace, happiness, security….  But, always, there is some underlying force or value. That grasp of what for us is the driving force is also at the very least a point of departure for some serious questioning. But, we will come to that.  The only point I want to make here is that I simply cannot understand how people can say, “there is no “God” if “God” means the driving force in our lives (or universe).

   It then becomes very clear that, whatever meaning or value we attach to “God,” none of the responses are satisfying or sufficient. Even the most religious person, the most brilliant theologian, the most profound philosopher, would want to say that the answers they have discovered in trying to understand “God” are inadequate.

   And thus, the search is on. We are continually, throughout our whole life, throughout the life of all humanity, trying to discover the dimensions of that ultimate driving force or value that underlies life, the universe, my own history and that of all humanity. And it is here precisely, in that relentless and unending search, that I would like to pause and reflect.

   For, what is it that would provide a sufficient answer to our searching questions? Only the full revelation of “God.”  What is it that has motivated us, driven us, and prodded us on in our search for answers to the question of “God,” if not God? “God” is then both the ultimate origin and destination for our search, our journey because it always begins and ends in “God.”
You will notice that I am consistently putting the word “God” in quotation marks. This is not at all to insist that I am referring simply to a word, a piece of vocabulary. “God” is written in quotation marks here to underline the fact that we can come to a grasp of the reality only by passing through the location of “God” within our consciousness - that part of us that looks for truth, verification and understanding. But, the search is not just for an idea but rather for an understanding that corresponds to a profound reality. Meaning is not something we just invent so that any answer, will do. In our search we demand verification. We are not satisfied with meanings and answers that fall short of explaining reality, that do not help us understand and deal with reality in all its dimensions. Thus, the search for “God” is indeed a search motivated by and satisfied only by a full and complete connection with the reality it signifies.

   Finally, we do not search only with our heads but also with our hearts. This search is also for a “God” who responds to the fundamental driving force that gives origin to our deepest desires and satisfactions and that only rests when it rests in God, as Augustine said.
Of course, some atheists might say that all this is irrelevant. When they say they do not believe in God, they are referring to the God of the major monotheistic religions: Judaism, Christianity and Islam. I grant them that. However, this does not take anything away from the fact that “God” is the driving force that guides us in life, our ultimate value. It also does not take away from the fact that “God” is always eluding us so that our search does not end. It does not take away from the fact, that the search is not just for some novel concept in our heads that will satisfy us even though it is totally disconnected with reality. And thus we are driven back to continue a search that has befuddled and driven all the great leaders of the traditions that derive from the great monotheistic (and pluri-theistic) religions.
 
   It is the search that counts. It rests on the conviction of an experience that validates that “driving presence” without understanding it.  This is the search that begins with the first glimmer of our human awareness and that only ends when it comes into profound union of mind and heart with that reality. We may start off with a search that centres on money, power, fame, profession, family or even the God announced by Abraham, Moses, Jesus or Mohammed. But, the search will only end when we rest in the profound reality that has pushed us forward and that comes to settle in our minds and hearts to give us finally the wholeness we have wished for.

   In my mind, no one is exempt from the density of this search. No one can get off easy by saying that they are “atheist.” Nor can anyone buy themselves out by saying they are Christian, Jewish or Muslim. Being any one of the above (including atheist) may provide us with pointers to what to look for (or what to avoid) but no one can absolve us from the search. It is absolutely central to our identity and our integrity as human beings.

   Fortunately, we do not journey alone. As Boethius said, almost 1500 years ago, we stand on the shoulders of giants. We do well to draw on the wisdom of those many giants to guide us on the journey.